I Tried to Talk Dirty

and Said ‘Groceries’ by Mistake

It was supposed to be hot.

I had a plan.
A sexy text. A little mid-afternoon tease.
I was going for sultry, maybe a little naughty. I typed fast, adrenaline pumping.

And then I hit send.

Photo by Firda Faradiba on Unsplash

Except autocorrect—or my own distracted brain—turned “I want your hands on me” into:

“I want your hands on the groceries.”

Yes.
Groceries.
Lik…