My Vagina Has Trust Issues
and Frankly,Same
At this stage in life, my vagina doesn’t want to be surprised.
No sudden moves. No enthusiastic fingers thinking they're 25 again. No “just relax” from someone who doesn’t have to relax their own pelvic floor.
Honestly?
She’s been through a lot—hormones ghosting her, dryness like the Mojave, and the audacity of medical providers telling her to use lube and “get over it.”
She’s not broken.
She’s protective.
She’s smart.
She’s got boundaries.
And frankly, so do I.
Trust Issues Are a Midlife Mood
After years of smiling through discomfort, brushing off pain, and pretending it’s “fine”—you wake up one day and realize:
Your body doesn’t trust you to listen.
Your vagina doesn’t trust that intimacy = safety.
And your nervous system is tired of clenching through bad sex, bad advice, and bad vibes.
Rebuilding Trust With Your Body Looks Like:
Saying no when you mean no
Saying not yet even when your partner’s ready
Choosing comfort over performance
Letting go of shame around using support (moisturizers, estrogen, vibrators, therapy)
Creating new rules for intimacy that honor you
You don’t owe your body to anyone.
You relearn trust. And with it, sometimes… desire returns.
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It’s your reboot.